Trust

We've got eight weeks left together. Eight weeks until you graduate and move on to middle school. I want to make the most of the time we have left.

Ever notice how you have classes on math and science and history and music and PE but none on social skills? I mean, we teachers talk about honesty and responsibility but we never really show you how to weave these things into your every day life or how they affect your relationships with people. This seems to me to be a very important subject, for without some guidance, it is really easy to go off in a wrong direction. Middle school can be like that; a bunch of kids with limited knowledge thinking they know more than they really do. Dangerous, too.

There is a saying that says "Forewarned is forearmed". This means that if you know about something before it happens, you can be prepared for it. Over these next few weeks, I'm going to let try to let you know what to expect in middle school and what you can do to prepare for it.

This is the pitfall of middle school: during your time there, you will undergo a dramatic change in the way you look at things. It's called puberty. You will become attracted to members of the opposite sex. It is perfectly natural, but some of the behaviors that go along with this change can be very hurtful. For starters, people of both genders will judge you, without knowing anything about you, solely on the basis of how you look.

I once had a student who always had a smile on her face. She'd constantly joke with me and always seemed to be in a good mood. After she left Park, I didn't see her again until she was in 7th grade. When I did, she'd changed completely. She didn't smile, and she barely talked, even when directly spoken to. She was listless, and lacked enthusiasm for anything she did. I asked her mom if she was okay.

"I think she's trying to figure out who her friends are," she said.

I also see a lot of other former Park School students who seem to be doing great. When I see them, we chat and they excitedly tell me about all the things they've been doing.

I almost always see students of this second type with a group of kids. In other words, they know who their friends are.

So, this is the first hurdle that you must overcome. Know what a true friend is, and who they are. How do you know?

Remember this: the foundation of any interpersonal relationship is trust. Who do you trust? Are you trustworthy? Trustworthy people are honest and treat each other with respect. They are your friend no matter who else is around and they don't say nasty things about you behind your back. Anyone who engages in untrustworthy behavior is not a friend.

So, figure out who your real friends are, and be true to them. Earn their trust by being trustworthy. If you have friends you can trust, you can handle just about anything.